Dear Birthmom

I dont think she'll ever see it, but........

You dont know me, but Im the woman who will be adopting your baby boy. I have been thinking about you alot lately. Im sure you havent given birth to him yet, but more and more Im finding myself wondering about you. How do you feel? Are you lonely, scared, hurt? Is your heart breaking because you will not be able to keep your baby with you? Are you excited about the prospect of him having a better life in another country, or are you just sad because you have to let him go. Probably both I guess.

I can only try to imagine what you must be going through, and how much your heart will break when you hand him over for the last time. When you see him for the last time. What a strong and courageous woman you are. Much more so than I will ever be. I admire you.

If it gives you any peace of mind at all, I want you to know that I will take the very best care of your son that I can all of his life. I'll make sure he feels safe and loved, that he gets a good education and learns respect and compassion for other people. I'll take care of him when he's sick, and try to make him laugh when he gets scared. I'll teach him things, and he will teach me too. I'll do my very best to make sure he knows everything I can tell him about where he came from in Vietnam. And of course I'll make sure that he knows whatever information I have about you. We will talk about you always. About how you loved him so much that you chose for him the chance for a better life than he could have in Vietnam. He will know that you didnt give him away, or abandon him because you didnt love him or didnt care. You did the very best you could for him. You will never forget him, the same as he will never forget you.

I also just want to say thank you to you. Motherhood and having a family has always been my dream, and thanks to you, that dream is coming true. You have given me the most precious gift in the world. It just makes me sad that my joy has to come as such a great price to you. As I rejoice over my new child, you will cry over the loss of yours.

My goal in writing this letter was to try to reassure you that your baby is going to a warm, loving family. I know you will always wonder and worry about what happened to him, but I hope that by reading this letter, you will be able to rest a little easier knowing that your son is being well taken care of. We will try our very best to make sure he stays happy and healthy, and above all else, knows he is loved not only by one family, but by two. One in America, and one on the other side of the world in Vietnam.

Chris